Many, many years ago I spent one glorious week in Salzburg,
Austria. I’ll never forget the sheer joy
of roaming around the exquisitely charming hometown of Mozart, just as I’ll
never forget the guided tour of the Hohensalzburg Fortress that fits on top of it
like a snug homburg. Usually I’m a
sucker for castles and fortresses, and this one had a number of beautiful
features, but the description of the torture chamber freaked me out and I
couldn’t get over it.
I think of this every time I want to buy a toothbrush. I look at the shelf, neatly stacked with rows
of brushes, and recoil. They look just
like the implements of torture I’ve seen in my nightmares, albeit in mockingly
cheerful colors, guaranteed to rip my mouth to shreds. There are spikes – actual spikes! – on those things, and the bristles are all
pointy and malicious-looking. What
dental hygienist from hell thought these would be a good idea?
To add insult to injury, these horrors also carry a hefty
price tag. Not only are you expected to
turn over your mouth to the Spanish Inquisition, you are required to fork over
a big wad of cash for the privilege. All
I want is a soft, pleasantly colored brush with even, white bristles – the sort
that caresses and treats your mouth like the living thing it is. But these are getting ever harder to
find. Instead we’re treated to wares
from the Torquemada School of Design. So
what I want to know is, is this a dental fad and if so, when will it pass?
3 comments:
Probably once humans evolve to not have teeth, because we've all started living off of flavored vitamin water, caffeine energy drinks and pro-biotic yogurt shakes. And beer. Of course beer.
Hmm, the liquid diet used to be a medical punishment for some malady or other. So, you're saying this is a plot to help evolution along?
Well, as long as there's beer, it feels like less of a punishment.
I suppose with all the drinks, I'm viewing it from the perspective of an American. It seems like people are always GOING, and looking for a quick, easy way to keep going.
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